I swear, I searched! KEY BATTERY REPLACEMENT
 

2001 9-3's spare key needs a new battery.

Is this rocket science? Will irreparably bad things happen should I replace the battery myself? Will I render it useless?

I know one of you guys has been there...help a (keyless) brutha out. Thanks!

Most of the saab keyless entry units use a regular 3 volt lithium battery. Specifically a 2032C. You should be able to use the actual key to pry it apart. It should not cause any problems. It should also be in the manual. If you don't have the manual, go online to the saab website and you can download a pdf versions.